I’m No Expert, But….
After I did the “How to Be Buffy” post a friend asked me to do a post about how to stay true to who you are and your values when you are in a place of testing. I stood there dumbfounded because I don’t really know the answer. Also, I thought, why would someone ask me? Do I look like I have it together? This time a year ago I found myself in a place of needing to find my way out of a cycle. I took the first few steps but there are many more to go. One major change needs to happen and I have just very recently accepted that I need to make it. As I take the necessary steps to make this major change, I still need to be integrous, joy-filled and grateful with where I am. Not necessarily happy, but at least filled with joy. I am blessed whether I am always able to see that or not. But the truth is, you guys, I don’t know how to do this. I am unhappy and anxious to make a flying leap. But I read a Jon Acuff book and I know I’m not supposed to do that. I have have also made flying leaps before and the second time it took me a year and a half to land on my feet. No more flying leaps without a mattress underneath. You don’t always end up in the Caribbean sipping Mai Tais. I need to plan this step well. Every bit of good counsel I have had at the beginning of my journey has reminded me not to make a choice out of fear and anxiety. One choice out of fear and anxiety can lead you to another.
Fear and anxiety have mounted because the years have brought me so far from my dreams that I have stopped dreaming. Younger Ebony was a great dreamer. I would easily lose time dreaming. My Mother use to love to watch my face as I day dreamed and would often comment on my facial expressions and sometimes ask me what I was thinking.
Spring 2015 brought with it the opportunity to dream anew and opened my eyes to opportunities I had no idea where possible. A year plus now into this endeavor and I am finding it hard to stay motivated. All of my initial excitement and euphoria has succumbed to the weight of the work of it. Even though I enjoy the work, it’s still work and sometimes its hard. This coupled with the dilemma of trying to make a big change has weighed me down. So, I’m looking for inspiration to return to joy and my days of being a “Daydream Believer”.
Pay Attention to the Woman Behind the Curtain
Sometimes I think that the Wizard of Oz gets a bad rap. Everyone thought he had magical powers, but when the curtain was pulled away and they found out he was just your average retirement-age white dude with fierce cheekbones doning a green suit, they were disappointed. What we miss is that this average AARP eligible man was able to create a gorgeous city filled with joy, peace and dreams. This man landed in a world where he knew no one, surrounded by people, places and things that made no sense and was able to build an empire with work and imagination. His gift was to make people believe in themselves and their potential to do great things.
What does this have to do with keeping your joy and integrity when you are in a place of testing you ask? Everything. The Wizard was up against a witch with legitimate magical powers and he still built The Emerald City. The scarecrow, tin-man, lion and Dorothy all were able to defeat her with the power of courage alone. You have everything you need inside of you. The place of testing is there to remind us we have what we need and to utilize it. But just like Dorothy, the lion, Scarecrow and Tin-man, they needed The Wizard to remind them they had everything they needed all along. This leads me to answer my dear friend’s inquiry. I’m going to do a series of interviews with real “Wizards”. People who can give us tools to use to tap into our ability to stay true to ourselves in times of testing. One of the things I have learned in my 30+ years is that I know I don’t know a lot. Accepting the knowledge you don’t know is the first step to being teachable.
I am looking forward to this series and hope you will join me with a teachable heart. Our mission is worthless if it isn’t done understanding the powers we posses and the knowledge to use them. I hope you will join me over the next few months as I talk to cool people and endeavor to understand how to use our magical human powers.
To The Revolution!