The Beast of Perfectionism
Day two of my Playwriting class and I won’t let them read the script I wrote. Why? Perfectionism. Perfectionism tells us that we have to know a certain amount or have done certain things to be qualified. It says that we might not hit the ground running with everyone knowing who we are immediately and so we shouldn’t do it unless we are going to be a huge splash. That’s bull! Perfectionism is the root of so much evil. So many people are not fulfilling their destinies. Many individuals are stuck in cubicles until retirement and dying a year or two after finally retiring from a job they never liked. I’ve been stuck in various cubicles and had my own office for a time doing jobs I did not enjoy. I’ve been bored and unhappy, in-authentic and depressed. Whenever I’ve said to a number of people that “I want to do what I love and get paid for it.” I’ve either been told that I am trying to validate myself or told that only a handful of people are lucky enough to get that honor. I’ve come to realize that their responses have more to say about them and their fears than having any basis in truth. It’s all a lie we’ve accepted.
So, where does this negative way of thinking get us? If we think this way, we are resigning ourselves to stay in the rat race and live in-authentic and unhappy work lives. I’m tired of hearing people every Monday, complain about coming to work. I’m tired of living for the weekend. Two friggin days?! That’s all I get?! I love Jim Carey’s quote when he gave a commencement speech in 2014, “You can get fired for doing something you hate, so why not fail trying to do something you love?”
Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway
I’m not doing this anymore. I’m not listening to people who don’t believe it’s possible and I’m not going to resign myself to a life in the doldrums. I’m not listening to “The Committee” in my head that refuses to shut up and constantly wants me to stay in the same place. A place where I’m not fulfilling my work and creative purpose. Yeah, they can be the same thing. Yes, I can do what I love, make money, travel and not have a “job that just pays the bills”.
A friend of mine was listening to a Pastor a couple of years ago and he said, “Do you want to know where the richest place is? A cemetery. The cemetery is filled with unused talents – people who never reached their full potential.”
My career coach’s favorite thing to say, apart from “Amazeballs” is “Feel the Fear and do it Anyway”. Fear can be good to stop us when we are about to get hurt. There are those gut feelings we push away because we don’t want to judge people or hurt anyone and find out in the end, that was a legitimate fear that was stopping us from making a real mistake and we ignored it. But then there is the fear that stops you because you are embarking on something new, something that will change your life for the better, but your brain doesn’t know what to make of it. That’s when we need to heed these words, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged,” – Joshua 1:9a (Bible)
Be Courageous
So, what does that mean for me? It means I will let my Playwriting class read my work in our next class. For me it was launching this new website. It means I am stepping forward, opening a new writing business, promoting it, marketing it and serving. I am sharing my gifts with others as God commanded us to do with our talents. I love this quote by Elizabeth Gilbert author of “Eat, Pray, Love” and “Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear ” If you don’t feel like you are ready, then you are. Every beautiful, amazing, magnificent creative thing that has ever been produced on this earth by a human being was produced by someone who wasn’t ready before they began.” I’m scared. I’m scared that these 10 years of not succeeding at a fulfilling life and career will just continue and this won’t work out. I’m afraid that I will self-sabotage or people will continue to not get me. I think the key is to be flexible and let the dream evolve. I think that if I let my business be about serving others, loving others the best way I can with my gifts, then God will guide me in this new endeavor. With courage I will embark on this new adventure. I’m raising my fist in the air, ignoring “The Committee” and the fears of others and moving forward.
I think that there might be a few of you who want a new path too. Don’t be scared to move forward. Don’t let the “it’s too late”, “it’s too early”, “I don’t know enough”, “I’m not good enough”, etc. lies stop you.
“What does the world need, that your talent can provide?” – Jim Carrey
I’m putting a bunch of links below for resources that can help you move forward. Some of these resources have helped and are helping me move forward in my creative purpose and career. You were meant to do fulfilling work and I want to take as many people on this journey with me as possible.
To The Revolution!
-Ebony
Tiffany Han – Raise Your Hand and Say Yes – Tiffany does a Career Camp w/ Michelle Ward (My Coach) for 6 months called It’s Business Time . You can sign up for it in March 2016.
Ann Rea: Fulfill Your Creative Purpose – This lesson got me started! So good!
Michelle Ward – Creative Career Coach – MY COACH!!! 🙂
The Good Life Project – Jonathan Fields – Love listening to these podcasts for motivation!!
Laura Simms – Find Your Career Home
Tanya Geisler: Step Into Your Starring Role – Leadership coach
Ebony Vines 